it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
