the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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