apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
