Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
if i died would you start the facebook group?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
