oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
