Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
