sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
