marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I think im going to throw up on grandma
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
