Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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