I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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