Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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