so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
