how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
so much tequila, so little girl.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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