do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
