when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
