Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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