I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
