I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Randomize
