I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement 😭😂
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