TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize
