:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
