yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
i came on her dog
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
