That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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