i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
