Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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