Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
