Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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