I am in a vortex of obligation.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Randomize
