Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
