I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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