Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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