Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
