You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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