Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
