i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
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