your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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