some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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