yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
