I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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