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Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
