Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize