final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
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