im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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