Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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