So drunk its hurt
I have demons in me.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
