they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
