What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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