farters have to be the big spoon...
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
The air was thick with penises
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
