i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
