i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Bang-toberfest begins!!
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
