nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize
